USED & ABUSED Brings the Community Together

What happens when you combine a kinky gear sale and swap, community organizations, artists, education, food, service—and well over 100 people?

You get USED & ABUSED: A Kinky Sale, Swap & Social.

On Saturday, August 22, NM-REAL, Purgatory Dungeon / SpectrumABQ, and Michko brought the community together for five hours of shopping, learning, conversation, and connection. We weren't keeping an exact head count, but well over 100 people came through the doors—and at times the facility was packed.

And there was a lot to explore.

Tables throughout the facility offered everything from bargains on previously loved gear to rare, unusual, and custom-made items. Community artists displayed their work alongside people clearing out their toy bags and closets. Some great deals disappeared quickly.

But USED & ABUSED was designed to be more than a sale.

Shop • Chat • Learn

Throughout the afternoon, free info sessions gave people a chance to wander into the dungeon, sit down, and learn something new.

MAsT hosted Bites, Boards & Belonging, drawing a great crowd for food, drinks, conversation, and an introduction to the MAsT community. Their guests certainly didn't leave hungry. Violet_Hz explored edge play and ways of thinking about risk and intensity beyond the usual categories. Goddess Fallon discussed The Beginner's BDSM Handbook for Aspiring Wise Kinksters and the lessons behind her writing. Pineapple talked about yoga, health, and the ways yoga can benefit people throughout the community. Sera Miles introduced people to the Soft Corners facility and another option for community events and gatherings.

The sessions were well attended, but education was happening everywhere—not just during scheduled presentations. People stopped at tables, asked questions, compared experiences, discovered organizations, met people they hadn't known before, and sometimes simply sat down and talked.

That was exactly the point.

Community Supporting Community

There were plenty of other things happening throughout the afternoon.

WINK brought a wonderfully colorful collection of toys. ONYX Men of Color offered items for sale and silent auction as a benefit. Stephen spent the afternoon providing free 15–20 minute massages while accepting donations benefiting NMLL. boy_Xtian provided bootblack services while also offering some of his own wares. NM-REAL, Inc., had many items for sale that had been donated by many in our community over the last couple years.

Artists, organizations, sellers, educators, volunteers, and attendees all contributed something different.

The result was less like walking into a conventional vendor fair and more like walking into a community gathering where there happened to be an enormous amount of interesting stuff for sale.

Where USED & ABUSED Came From

Events like this don't simply appear.

The original inspiration came from Michko, who wanted to bring people together around common interests, conversation, and the idea of a kinky gear swap and sale.

Bear Mike developed that idea into USED & ABUSED, expanding the concept to include short community info sessions alongside the sale, swap, and social.

Making it possible required partnership. Purgatory Dungeon / SpectrumABQ provided use of the facility at no charge and helped staff the event. NM-REAL organized the event, with board members Rebecca, Persephone, and Bear Mike working alongside Purgatory staff and others to make the day happen. Some of them made their way to the free photo booth to take this picture:

That collaboration matters because keeping the event free was part of the concept from the beginning. Sellers could participate, organizations could introduce themselves, presenters could share what they knew, and community members could simply walk through the door and explore.

No ticket required.

More Than Used Stuff

Yes, plenty of used and abused gear, books & magazines, new items, and artwork, found new homes.

But looking around the rooms Saturday, something else was being exchanged too: knowledge, introductions, stories, opportunities, and connections.

Some people came looking for bargains. Some came for an info session. Some represented organizations or sold their work. Some came because friends were there. Others simply wanted to see what USED & ABUSED was all about.

Together, they created the event.

And judging from the crowd, the conversations, and the energy in the building, apparently the community had some stuff to sell—and a lot to talk about.